SIREN FESTIVAL 2006 preview: Stars, Cribs, Dirty On Purpose

This weekend, thousands of hipsters will take the Q train to the Siren festival, sponsored by the Village Voice, held on a sweltering street in Coney Island. The unwashed will be wearing Sufjan Stevens t-shirts and Neighborhoodies and lilting in the 90+ degree weather waiting for the Scissor Sisters to come on. Here's a quick guide on how to avoid the headaches of Siren:

1. Pick only 2 or 3 bands to see. Hopefully they will all be playing near or around the same time. This year, unfortunately, my recommendations for Dirty On Purpose (3:30pm) and Stars (8pm), are a bit far apart. Good news is, that whole stage starting at 3:30 with DOP goes Serena Maneesh, Cribs, Art Brut, Stars. So you know where to be at least.

2. When the timeline in 1 fails you, find some key places to hang out and have fun. I always pick Ruby's up on the boardwalk. I get a corndog and a couple of Bud bottles and sit in the back, in the shade, listening to the Bobby Darin on the jukebox. If you are too hot, don't go on the beach. Hit the log flume. It's worth it and the lines usually aren't too long. A bottle of water is $2, but sitting with 3 other friends in a log boat and having water splash you all is priceless, or $4 each.

3. Don't overdo it. I know you want to hit some balls in the batting cages on Stillwell, but guess what, that shit makes you tired, fast. Also, don't stand in the street like some kid waiting for your bands to go on. You're not going to get any better position and you don't need to get any closer to Tapes N Tapes, believe me, so just stroll in from Ruby's at gametime and watch from wherever. The pavement is melting beneath your feet, don't get caught in the tar quicksand.

After you are done with all that nonsense, head to the new place in Park Slope called Union Hall, and hear Torquil from Stars and members of Dirty On Purpose spin records for you. See, they are going to be worked up, so come relax with them and tell them how much you love them.

Maybe next year Siren can move this whole thing to the beach? I mean, seriously. On the street, or sand between your toes? I pick the latter. Then we can watch people jump into the drink.

Stars THE WOODS (early demo)
Dirty On Purpose YOUR SUMMER DRESS
The Cribs YOU ARE ALWAYS THE ONE